What if the real key to helping young people thrive isn’t about “fixing” them but simply showing up, listening, and creating spaces where they feel seen?

Mentorship, Mission & the Youth

Mentorship, Mission & the Youth

On this episode of the ANEW Insight Podcast, I had the absolute pleasure of speaking with Dr. JC Montenegro—a powerhouse in youth development and one of those rare souls who truly walks the walk. He’s the executive director of the Salesian Families Youth Center here in Los Angeles, and for over 20 years, he’s been lifting up underserved communities, not with ego or flashy solutions, but with consistency, love, and a fierce belief in the power of mentorship.

This conversation left me inspired and, honestly, a little more hopeful about what’s possible when we commit to being present for our youth.

“I was one of those troublemaker kids…”

Dr. JC opens up right away about his childhood how struggling with dyslexia made him feel like an outsider in the academic world. “If you’re not getting good grades, you feel like you don’t belong,” he said.

But everything changed when, at just 18 years old, he volunteered to teach in the Amazon jungle. That experience helped him realize that he was capable. Smart. Needed.

It lit a fire in him to turn around and help others the way someone once helped him.

“What I do now is simply what someone did for me.”

Mentorship Isn’t Just a Person, It’s a System

One of my favorite moments in our conversation was when I asked if he had a mentor he was especially grateful for. Instead of naming one person, he said something I’ll never forget:

“It wasn’t one person. It was the whole village.”

He talked about how the Salesian model gave him not just mentorship but a supportive environment—a web of people who walked beside him. A parent, a priest, a fellow volunteer. They all played a role in helping him discover who he was.

This is the model he now brings to his own work: not a savior complex, but a community mindset. A tribe, as he puts it. Because kids don’t just need one adult who believes in them. They need many.

The Silent Epidemic: Social Media and Disconnection

We got into the topic of today’s youth, and unsurprisingly, Dr. JC pointed to social media as one of the most dangerous—and overlooked—threats to emotional development.

These kids are spending 8, 9, even 12 hours a day glued to screens. And the scary part? It’s not just about content. It’s about what they’re not doing during that time—building real relationships, learning how to resolve conflict, expressing themselves face-to-face.

“They don’t know how to say what they’re feeling… until they text it to you.”

As someone who works in mental health, I’ve seen this too. The rise in anxiety, depression, and disconnection is undeniable. Social media isn’t just distracting it’s rewiring how young people relate to themselves and others.

Survival Mode: The Pressure Facing Immigrant Families

Dr. JC also spoke candidly about the pressures many immigrant families face especially here in L.A., where rent alone can feel crushing. In the families he works with, it’s common for several people to share one room. Parents are often working two jobs just to keep the lights on. That means less time for connection. Less energy for communication.

And in the background? Constant fear especially in communities where immigration status is fragile. Even kids who were born here live with the anxiety that someone they love could be taken away.

“These kids are shouldering adult fears… and no one’s really talking to them about it.”

Empowerment Begins with Listening

So how do we help?

Dr. JC’s answer is simple, but not easy: listen.

He believes we’ve created a culture that doesn’t allow kids to fail, to struggle, or to speak. We protect them from consequences, shield them from discomfort and in doing so, we rob them of growth.

“We don’t allow our children to fall. But falling is how we learn.”

He shared a story of a parent upset that her child had been asked to leave school. Instead of blaming the school, he gently suggested: maybe this is a teaching moment. Maybe the child can learn that actions have consequences—and that’s not a bad thing.

Structure, Not Control

One of the things I appreciate most about JC’s approach is that he’s not into micromanaging kids or lecturing them. He’s into giving them structure guiding them, not controlling them.

Whether it’s negotiating with a peer, expressing a point of view, or learning how to recover after a mistake, he’s helping them build the tools they’ll need in real life.

And yes he’s working with parents too, when they’re willing and able. As he put it, “We are not isolated. If we want to help these kids, we have to work together. Schools, families, youth centers. We all play a role.”

The Case for Rethinking Education

Toward the end of our conversation, we talked about education and the urgent need for change.

JC pointed out that the way we’re teaching kids today hasn’t really changed in decades. It’s still all about memorization, test scores, and fitting into a mold. But the world has changed. And our kids need more than just facts they need critical thinking, empathy, life skills, and the space to become who they’re meant to be.

“If you empower kids to think, really think, they might not always agree with you. And that’s a good thing.”

He’s not interested in creating obedient kids. He wants to raise thoughtful, self-sufficient adults who can speak up, ask hard questions, and lead with integrity.

Why This Matters So Much

This episode hit home for me in so many ways. As a therapist, dietitian, and educator, I’ve seen the damage disconnection can do to a young person’s sense of self. And I’ve seen the power of what happens when even one adult believes in them.

Dr. JC isn’t just giving speeches he’s in the trenches every day. Creating safe spaces. Holding hard conversations. Showing up.

And that gives me hope.

Because if enough of us start doing the same at our kitchen tables, in our schools, in our neighborhoods we can build something better. A village that listens. A village that heals.

🎧 Listen to the full episode with Dr. JC Montenegro on the ANEW Insight Podcast
📺 Watch it now on YouTube: @my.anew.insight

🌐 Stream it at: anew-insight.com under the Podcast tab
📘 Explore these ideas in my book, Deprogram Diet Culture
💻 Take the full course at: anew-insight.com

View  here full podcast Transcript here:

00:00:02:02 – 00:00:04:15

Welcome to the ANEW Insight podcast

 

00:00:04:15 – 00:00:08:08

empowering and inspiring your journey

to optimal health.

 

00:00:08:08 – 00:00:12:01

Hosted by Doctor

Supatra Tovar, clinical psychologist,

 

00:00:12:01 – 00:00:17:06

registered dietitian, fitness expert

and author of Deprogram Diet Culture:

 

00:00:17:06 – 00:00:22:11

Rethink Your Relationship with Food,

Heal Your Mind, and Live a Diet Free Life.

 

00:00:22:11 – 00:00:25:09

I follow my guests’ journey

to optimal health,

 

00:00:25:09 – 00:00:29:15

providing you with the keys

to unlock your own wellness path.

 

00:00:29:15 – 00:00:32:03

Tune in and evolve with us.

 

00:00:34:04 – 00:00:37:00

Hello and welcome

 to the ANEW Insight podcast.

 

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I am Doctor Supatra Tovar,

and I am so excited to have executive

 

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director, life coach, and nonprofit leader

 

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Doctor Jc Montenegro with us today.

 

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Doctor Jc,

thank you so much for joining us.

 

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Thank you for having me.

 

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Thank you for this opportunity

to share who we are 

 

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and what we do for the community.

 

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I can’t wait to learn more.

 

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I’m going to read a little bit

 

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about Doctor Jc, and then we’ll get

right into the questions.

 

00:01:02:12 – 00:01:04:21

Doctor Jc Montenegro is an executive

 

00:01:04:21 – 00:01:09:14

director, life coach, and nonprofit leader

with over 20 years

 

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of experience in youth development

and community empowerment.

 

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Currently serving as the Executive

Director of the Salesian Families

 

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Youth Center in Los Angeles.

 

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He has led the organization

through significant challenges securing

 

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funding and increasing donor engagement

to ensure long term sustainability.

 

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Doctor Montenegro holds a Ph.D.

 

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in sociology and an MBA with specialized

training in youth ministry.

 

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He has also played a pivotal role

in international social initiatives,

 

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including developing a strategic plan

for Red America Social Salesians

 

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and launching volunteer programs in

the Dominican Republic, Haiti and Tijuana.

 

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Bilingual in English and Spanish, Doctor

Montenegro

 

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is dedicated to mentoring

the next generation of leaders

 

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and creating sustainable

nonprofit solutions

 

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that foster personal growth

and community development.

 

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Welcome, Doctor Jc.

 

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Thank you, thank you so much.

 

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So excited to

 

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find out more about what you’re doing

helping youth in especially today’s

 

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climate after Covid

and in this political climate,

 

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you have an amazing career

and you have dedicated this career

 

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to supporting disadvantaged youth.

 

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Share with us what sparked your passion

for working with youth?

 

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I was one of those troublemaker kids.

 

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So when I was a child,

I actually suffered dyslexia

 

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and that in a sense of growing

up, gave me away from the normal things.

 

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You know, you need to be a good student

 

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and you have good grades

and everybody will be happy with you.

 

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But when you don’t fit in

 

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the academic system, per se,

you feel that rejection,

 

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you feel that you don’t belong to something

 

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and in a sense, thanks to the Salesians

 

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and the educational system that they have,

I was able to find myself

 

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through an experience

that I did in the middle

of the Amazon jungle.

 

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So I went to the Amazon jungle

as a teacher when I was 18 years old,

 

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as a volunteer missionary.

 

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Wow. That changed my life

because from that moment,

 

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I understood what it meant to study,

 

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I understood

that I was good for something.

 

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And thanks to that is when

 

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I started

 

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in a sense trying to give back.

 

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What am I doing here?

 

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Is basically doing what someone did for me,

is that gratification

 

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that we think so many times in our culture

we are not grateful.

 

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You know, there are people who help us out

and then we forget about

 

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where we come from.

 

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And, you know, we live our life

and we’re happy ever after.

 

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But I think there is something beauty for

when you actually are giving back,

 

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realizing where you come from,

 

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Where you really, are your roots,

 

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and who were the people who were there

to help you out to get out of it.

 

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How how you can actually give back to others

who are in the same situation you were.

 

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I love that.

 

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Do you have one particular mentor

 

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that you’re very, very grateful for?

 

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I think there is a whole system,

and that is the beautiful thing

 

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about the Salesians is no one person

who has made the difference in your life,

 

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but is, a combination of people

who have been there

 

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and make a difference in your life.

 

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Like, for example,

when I was a little kid, I think my dad

 

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has a lot to do,

because he has walked with me 

through my whole life,

 

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my dad and my mom.

 

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But in those moments where my dad

and my mom

 

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didn’t know how to deal with me

when I was 12,

 

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12 years old, 13, 14,

there was this priest

 

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whose name was Antonia,

who was helping me in that process.

 

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I think when I became a 18 years old

 

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and I went to the Amazon jungle,

there was this priest,

 

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his name is Domingo

 

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who was there accompanying me with Silvio

 

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And then when I got out of the mission,

there was, 

 

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So, in a sense, the system

 

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the environment is what helped me to grow.

 

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And that is why it’s so important.

 

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And I think there is a saying in Africa you know,

 

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that to raise a child you need a tribe.

 

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And it’s so true, there’s not only one person

who’s making the difference.

 

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But is a combination of everybody

who supported the child to become the best

they can be.

 

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It sounds like, you know,

they also say it takes a village.

 

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It sounds like the entire village

and the tribe was there for you,

 

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and you’ve created a tribe of your own

 

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or a village of your own

to help the next generation forward.

 

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So what do you think are the most pressing

challenges that disadvantaged youth face

 

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today, especially in light of the pandemic

and what’s happening politically?

 

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One of the biggest challenges

that we are suffering right now is social media.

 

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The fact that the young people have,

 

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unlimited access to anything

and everything

 

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that they can imagine, is unbelievable.

 

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The fact that,

 

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many of these, social media,

 

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platforms per se,

 

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they’re addictive.

 

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If you really think about it,

I mean, for adults,

 

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I can speak about myself, sometimes

 

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I will be in  these social media

 

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is like it’s scrolling up and down,

and I’m can spend hours.

 

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You know, imagine someone who is 12,

13, 14.

 

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15 years old.

 

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Yes. And this is really interesting,

 

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And you can ask any young person right now

 

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what is that average screen time

 that you have that the phones give it to you,

 

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and many young people have

 

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Seven, eight,

nine, 12 hours of screen time.

 

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And you wonder,

where do they get those hours

 

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if they’re in school and why not?

 

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Sometimes they don’t always live well.

 

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Yes. So I think part of the problem with this is not only for disadvantaged youth, 

 

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this is for every single young person,

 

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is the fact that we have

 

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giving too much freedom, in my opinion,

 

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in the sense of social media,

 

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when the child

 

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in the restaurant, and there is a child

4 or 5 years old, if they are quite

 

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It is because they are in,

 

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you know, in the, in the tablet. Yes.

 

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But I think to me that is the biggest

the major issue

 

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that I, that I realized how do we get

how can we get them out of it

 

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Yeah.

 

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The problem with that is not only are you addicted to this,

 

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but developmental, you don’t

develop in the same way, like for example

 

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when I was a little kid, we were outside

playing, you know, talking to friends.

 

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Making sure that we deal with bullying

 

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or how they treat each other or not.

 

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Now, these kids are on their phones,

 

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their ability to communicate,

their ability to speak, their ability

 

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to to share their feelings

has happened to me that many times

 

00:08:06:12 – 00:08:10:07

that never be able to find out

what is going on with them, when they text me,

 

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you know, how are you feeling?

They cannot put into words.

 

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But when they text you, they can tell you how they feel.

 

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Yes. To me,

I think those are critical components

 

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that as a society, we need to be aware.

 

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We need to be mindful.

 

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We need to when we need to say, I mean,

we’re giving a phone to a 12 year old

 

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what do we expect?

 

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There is no any type of,

 

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filter in what is being shown.

 

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And in reality, social media

 

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what it does

is they provide what you want to see.

 

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Of course, or maybe not even what you want

to see, what you’ve been looking at.

 

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And then they give you more of that

 

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and that sends them down a rabbit hole

and that affects their mental health.

 

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That’s what I saw,

especially during the pandemic.

 

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We saw such a rise in depression

and anxiety,

 

00:09:01:13 – 00:09:04:16

kids who are also having to be on zoom

all the time.

 

00:09:04:22 – 00:09:08:20

We’re having difficulties

with, you know, body image dysmorphia.

 

00:09:09:06 – 00:09:11:19

So many difficulties.

 

00:09:11:19 – 00:09:14:19

I’m also wondering,

aside from social media,

 

00:09:15:03 – 00:09:19:12

are there any challenges

that are particular to right now

 

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rather than kind of all the time

that you’re

 

00:09:22:19 – 00:09:25:19

seeing,

with the youth you’re working with?

 

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I think with the young people

that we work with, many of them come from,

 

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Hispanic immigrant families.

 

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So even they were born here,

or they came when they were little kids.

 

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So their parents, they need to really work

 

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really hard to be able to survive. Yes.

 

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And we live in Los Angeles, Los Angeles

 

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the living expenses are huge.

 

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So to be able to live in that in a,

 

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in a house where you need to pay

what, $3,000-4,000 a month.

 

00:09:56:15 – 00:09:57:05

Yeah.

 

00:09:57:05 – 00:10:00:14

To be able to get that money to pay

you need to have two jobs.

 

00:10:00:14 – 00:10:02:04

And dad and mom needs to work, so.

 

00:10:02:15 – 00:10:06:14

So I think that is another big challenge

that you see that many of these parents

 

00:10:06:14 – 00:10:10:11

have been working really hard

to, to be able to, to survive.

 

00:10:10:18 – 00:10:14:04

Now, if you cannot survive in one room, or

 

00:10:14:06 – 00:10:16:00

you don’t have enough money

to pay, you rent somewhere else.

 

00:10:16:00 – 00:10:19:00

Well, so, so many of the families

that we work with,

 

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they sleep on a couch, they don’t have a room.

 

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They shared the room with 3 or 4 people.

 

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So this is something

that has become the norm for some of the

 

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young people that we work with.

 

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Talking about immigration, you know,

right now

 

00:10:33:20 – 00:10:37:16

the whole political statements 

that we have in regards to immigration

 

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So you have kids who have been born here,

 

00:10:40:12 – 00:10:44:23

but the whole existence is

raising up culturally is from other countries.

 

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And then they are in fear 

that their parents are going to be deported.

 

00:10:48:14 – 00:10:52:18

Yes, there is

there is a lot of social dynamics

 

00:10:52:18 – 00:10:56:17

that are difficult to 

sometimes to understand. Yes.

 

00:10:57:07 – 00:11:00:07

The other thing I’ve seen a lot is a lot of,

mental health.

 

00:11:01:04 – 00:11:04:13

Yes. But I think that is part of the consequence

of social media as well.

 

00:11:04:23 – 00:11:09:02

But a lot of mental health,

the families are way more smaller than before.

 

00:11:09:08 – 00:11:13:09

Yes. My family, we were three,

but between the three of us, we fought.

 

00:11:13:09 – 00:11:18:01

We you know, we discussed everything else,

sometimes you have families of one child,

 

00:11:18:02 – 00:11:19:09

two children.

 

00:11:19:09 – 00:11:24:21

I think the ability to communicate to develop with other people their age is

 

00:11:26:05 – 00:11:27:15

a really interesting dynamic.

 

00:11:27:15 – 00:11:31:09

So what we try to

provide is a place for them to, to,

 

00:11:31:09 – 00:11:33:12

to give those things

that they can at home.

 

00:11:33:12 – 00:11:35:13

You know, like you are here,

you need to talk to someone

 

00:11:35:13 – 00:11:38:12

and you need to be able to to negotiate

what you want.

 

00:11:38:12 – 00:11:41:06

You need to speak to convince your thoughts.

 

00:11:41:06 – 00:11:44:17

And so it’s a beautiful dynamics

where we provide

 

00:11:44:17 – 00:11:47:17

to the young people

that we have opportunities that in

 

00:11:47:19 – 00:11:50:15

other cases, they won’t. Yes, I love that.

 

00:11:50:15 – 00:11:55:09

And I think, you know,

they feel so disempowered.

 

00:11:55:16 – 00:11:59:17

I do think it’s probably even worse

now in the political climate.

 

00:12:00:00 – 00:12:03:12

I used to do some work at Second Street

Elementary down in Boyle Heights,

 

00:12:03:12 – 00:12:05:22

and I’ve worked in this neighborhood

a lot.

 

00:12:05:22 – 00:12:08:18

And so those challenges

have always been there.

 

00:12:08:18 – 00:12:14:03

But I can imagine that the fear of ICE

and, you know, what’s happening,

 

00:12:14:03 – 00:12:17:22

what could happen to their parents

is really disempowering for them.

 

00:12:17:22 – 00:12:24:19

And I know that you are very big

in terms of trying to empower these kids.

 

00:12:24:19 – 00:12:29:23

So how do you approach this way,

like the way that you empower them?

 

00:12:29:23 – 00:12:34:08

How do you do that

and how does that foster long term growth?

 

00:12:36:00 – 00:12:39:00

I think one of the main

 

00:12:39:03 – 00:12:43:21

skills that we need to learn,

especially nowadays, is listening skills.

 

00:12:45:06 – 00:12:47:08

We don’t listen, and as a parent,

 

00:12:47:08 – 00:12:50:13

sometimes we just tend to tell

how things are like

 

00:12:50:13 – 00:12:53:13

we were raised, but we don’t listen,

 

00:12:53:23 – 00:12:56:10

we are in, in.

 

00:12:56:10 – 00:13:00:01

In an era, where we need to be,

really attentive of listening.

 

00:13:00:18 – 00:13:02:17

You know, we need to ask them questions.

 

00:13:02:17 – 00:13:05:18

We need to allow them to fall.

I think part of the problem is

 

00:13:05:18 – 00:13:08:18

that we have as a society,

we don’t allow our children to fall.

 

00:13:09:11 – 00:13:12:03

If something’s happened,

we need to be careful,

 

00:13:12:03 – 00:13:12:11

we need to

 

00:13:12:11 – 00:13:13:21

we need to take care of them.

 

00:13:13:21 – 00:13:16:11

You know sometimes,

 

00:13:16:11 – 00:13:20:13

you know, making mistakes

is actually a, a beautiful experience you know.

 

00:13:21:08 – 00:13:24:10

Yesterday I was actually talking

to one of the parents,

 

00:13:24:23 – 00:13:28:00

and she was disappointed because something

happened at the school and

 

00:13:29:10 – 00:13:31:14

the kid was asked to leave the school.

 

00:13:31:14 – 00:13:35:14

She was upset and I was telling her

maybe there’s a beautiful opportunity

 

00:13:35:14 – 00:13:38:21

for your child to know that there’s

consequences about your behaviors.

 

00:13:39:16 – 00:13:41:00

So this happens,

 

00:13:41:00 – 00:13:43:08

instead of blaming everybody else,

 

00:13:43:08 – 00:13:46:00

let’s assume responsibility

of where we are.

 

00:13:46:00 – 00:13:48:06

At least try to make it work. So I think 

 

00:13:48:06 – 00:13:51:16

sometimes we are so polarized

between what is right and what’s wrong.

 

00:13:52:01 – 00:13:54:21

You know, there are things that happen

that and those things

 

00:13:54:21 – 00:13:58:21

actually become something

beautiful like myself,

 

00:13:58:21 – 00:14:01:21

if I wouldn’t have dyslexia, I probably wouldn’t be here.

 

00:14:02:17 – 00:14:04:00

Oh, absolutely.

 

00:14:04:00 – 00:14:08:00

Absolutely do in my business

when making money and whatnot.

 

00:14:08:00 – 00:14:13:08

But the fact that I had this situation

in my life actually moved me 

to a different  reality.

 

00:14:13:23 – 00:14:17:04

And I think that is one of the challenges 

that we need to see as adults

 

00:14:17:04 – 00:14:19:07

is being able to help them out

 

00:14:19:07 – 00:14:22:11

to empower to find what is it

 that they are called to be.

 

00:14:23:02 – 00:14:24:01

Not to do.

 

00:14:24:01 – 00:14:26:16

Well how do you let them fall?

 

00:14:26:16 – 00:14:30:14

I think that those two skills, learning

how to listen

 

00:14:30:22 – 00:14:34:16

and learning from mistakes are invaluable.

 

00:14:34:16 – 00:14:38:00

And I think is probably more of a

our part of our generation.

 

00:14:38:09 – 00:14:43:03

You know, I grew up

as part of the latchkey generation.

 

00:14:43:03 – 00:14:47:10

So we were just left to our own devices

and we had to figure it out.

 

00:14:47:17 – 00:14:52:08

But how do you do that under a structured

environment like at Salesian?

 

00:14:53:14 – 00:14:55:10

I think

 

00:14:55:10 – 00:14:58:03

I am a father too, I have a 21 years old.

 

00:14:58:03 – 00:15:02:23

And, with him, before, before, before him it was interesting

 

00:15:02:23 – 00:15:06:14

because I felt that I was the superhero,

the good, oh my goodness

 

00:15:06:14 – 00:15:09:05

I mean, you read

the resume as impressive.

 

00:15:09:05 – 00:15:12:07

Then when you go with your own child,

you do realize that sometimes you

 

00:15:12:07 – 00:15:13:10

feel like a failure, because

 

00:15:13:18 – 00:15:15:16

you know,

you do all this for other people,

 

00:15:15:16 – 00:15:18:16

and yet with your own child 

you can not even do it, you know.

 

00:15:18:16 – 00:15:21:15

I think the reality in my case is

 

00:15:22:13 – 00:15:26:19

they need to understand

that everything that they do has consequences.

 

00:15:27:05 – 00:15:31:11

I think that is, to me,

the biggest change in my time,

 

00:15:31:11 – 00:15:33:19

it was not consequences, it was punishment.

 

00:15:33:19 – 00:15:36:04

If you do something wrong,

you will be punished.

 

00:15:36:04 – 00:15:38:20

But the point is, is someone else,

 

00:15:38:20 – 00:15:41:02

you know, giving you

 

00:15:41:02 – 00:15:42:00

what you need to do.

 

00:15:42:00 – 00:15:45:21

But when you’re talking about consequences,

it is actually starting a dialogue.

 

00:15:46:07 – 00:15:50:22

I have my son, he’s like I wanna have

a credit card because I’m working.

 

00:15:50:22 – 00:15:53:19

I really want to do the

we want to be able to build credit.

 

00:15:53:19 – 00:15:58:13

I say, if you have the credit card, these 

are the realities of what can happen.

 

00:15:58:14 – 00:15:58:19

You know,

 

00:16:00:16 – 00:16:02:05

he has to deal with his own consequences.

 

00:16:02:05 – 00:16:05:05

I love it. As a, as a, as a father,

 

00:16:05:15 – 00:16:08:05

the only thing that you need to say

is I’m here to support you.

 

00:16:08:05 – 00:16:11:14

I love you,

but you ended up in that situation.

 

00:16:11:15 – 00:16:14:02

You have to take care of that situation.

 

00:16:14:02 – 00:16:15:08

And if you want me to help you,

 

00:16:15:08 – 00:16:18:08

what is the conditions, how can we

 work that out together?

 

00:16:18:09 – 00:16:19:20

You know,

 

00:16:19:20 – 00:16:23:06

like if there is a child

who’s having an issue in the school

 

00:16:23:14 – 00:16:27:01

instead of going to the school trying to

defend your child, ask what happened.

 

00:16:28:19 – 00:16:30:07

What’s going on?

 

00:16:30:07 – 00:16:31:22

What is it?

 

00:16:31:22 – 00:16:35:18

But I think so many times

we we are so blind to our children

 

00:16:35:18 – 00:16:38:21

the best thing that ever happened

in the world

 

00:16:39:10 – 00:16:42:05

that we forget that

what happened when we are not there.

 

00:16:42:05 – 00:16:44:20

Right. That is my question.

 

00:16:44:20 – 00:16:47:04

Many times, that I give conference,

 

00:16:47:04 – 00:16:51:07

do you train your child

to be self-sufficient the moment that you’re not there?

 

00:16:51:14 – 00:16:52:14

Because that will happen.

 

00:16:54:02 – 00:16:56:00

We hope that is later that sooner.

 

00:16:56:00 – 00:16:59:05

But that will happen, but how are we training them

 

00:16:59:16 – 00:17:02:10

so they can be sufficient,

so they can speak for themselves,

 

00:17:02:10 – 00:17:04:22

so they can defend their, their arguments,

 

00:17:04:22 – 00:17:07:07

their point of view, and they can 

present who they are.

 

00:17:07:07 – 00:17:09:17

So it sounds like a lot of your work

is also working

 

00:17:09:17 – 00:17:12:17

with the parents as well as the kids.

 

00:17:13:03 – 00:17:15:05

When they allow us

to work with the parents.

 

00:17:15:05 – 00:17:18:15

So many times, the parents also,

they’re so busy making money

 

00:17:18:15 – 00:17:22:02

and making sure that everybody’s fine and

they have the meaning of providing that

 

00:17:22:02 – 00:17:22:18

they just,

 

00:17:25:15 – 00:17:29:03

called them out, hey I’m outside

 can you send my kid, so.

 

00:17:29:21 – 00:17:32:12

And even in my ministry, I.

 

00:17:34:00 – 00:17:37:16

I think I have been trying

to reach out to the parents as well

 

00:17:38:05 – 00:17:42:08

because, at the end, is a

is a in society? Yes.

 

00:17:42:08 – 00:17:44:21

I don’t think, sometimes we understand that,

 

00:17:44:21 – 00:17:47:05

we as an entity,

 

00:17:47:12 – 00:17:51:14

if we are not connected

with other people, we’re not going anywhere.

 

00:17:51:19 – 00:17:53:20

Yes, yes. Less impact per se.

 

00:17:53:20 – 00:17:57:13

As a therapist,

you know, it was part of our work

 

00:17:57:13 – 00:18:01:17

to call in the parents

and help them understand

 

00:18:01:19 – 00:18:05:16

what was going on with their child,

help them with parenting techniques.

 

00:18:06:00 – 00:18:09:14

And I think that that just goes along

with your whole

 

00:18:09:22 – 00:18:13:15

notion of it’s a village,

we all need to help each other out.

 

00:18:13:15 – 00:18:17:04

And oftentimes

parents, especially hard working parents

 

00:18:17:10 – 00:18:21:23

that are working, maybe even multiple

jobs, don’t necessarily have the time

 

00:18:21:23 – 00:18:27:00

or the bandwidth to even think about

the structure that their child needs.

 

00:18:27:06 – 00:18:32:04

But there’s a lot of very simple ways

that you can give the child structure.

 

00:18:32:10 – 00:18:35:18

And it sounds like your work is mostly

with the children

 

00:18:36:02 – 00:18:41:06

and helping and giving them inspiration

and helping them feel empowered,

 

00:18:41:13 – 00:18:46:15

and then helping them learn

how to listen and also how to communicate.

 

00:18:46:23 – 00:18:48:11

That’s so beautiful.

 

00:18:48:11 – 00:18:53:20

And I think, you know, it

speaks to a larger systemic issue.

 

00:18:53:20 – 00:18:56:06

What we’re seeing with today’s youth.

 

00:18:56:06 – 00:18:59:13

And I think that that comes

from the educational system.

 

00:19:00:00 – 00:19:03:07

What do you think needs to be reformed,

 

00:19:04:16 – 00:19:06:01

if you can name a couple things?

 

00:19:06:01 – 00:19:10:17

I’m sure there’s a million things

in current, educational system,

 

00:19:10:17 – 00:19:14:14

especially in light of them

trying to dismantle the Department

 

00:19:14:14 – 00:19:17:14

of Education and so forth.

 

00:19:17:14 – 00:19:20:14

I would ask one simple

question is the same way,

 

00:19:20:14 – 00:19:23:14

we used to receive classes

is the same way how

 

00:19:23:16 – 00:19:25:15

my parents used to receive classes,

 

00:19:25:15 – 00:19:29:08

and the same way probably my 

grandparents used to receive classes.

 

00:19:29:09 – 00:19:32:15

So the reality is that the educational system hasn’t

 

00:19:32:15 – 00:19:35:15

changed. Yes.

 

00:19:35:19 – 00:19:39:11

It has been the same system

for so many years.

 

00:19:39:11 – 00:19:42:02

And the reality is

we are in a different era.

 

00:19:42:02 – 00:19:44:11

We are in a different way of doing things,

 

00:19:44:11 – 00:19:45:13

we are in a different dynamics.

 

00:19:45:13 – 00:19:49:05

And if we don’t change the way

for we helping young people to

 

00:19:49:05 – 00:19:53:10

interact, to talk to, to

those type of  things is difficult.

 

00:19:54:00 – 00:19:56:07

Even when you’re trying, and and

 

00:19:56:07 – 00:19:58:11

and I wanted to mention this before 

 

00:19:58:23 – 00:20:02:00

When I empower young people, 

I empower them to have voice,

 

00:20:02:00 – 00:20:05:10

to talk to, to, to to say what they believe.

 

00:20:05:18 – 00:20:08:20

But it’s interesting because sometimes

when they are in power enough

 

00:20:09:21 – 00:20:12:07

sometimes they don’t think

in the same way that you think.

 

00:20:12:07 – 00:20:12:18

Right.

 

00:20:12:18 – 00:20:14:05

Think how you do it.

 

00:20:14:05 – 00:20:17:14

So, you empower them only when, you

 

00:20:17:14 – 00:20:19:12

in the things that are convenience to you?

 

00:20:19:12 – 00:20:20:11

Right.

 

00:20:20:11 – 00:20:23:17

Or you empower them in all the way 

and help them to think and to be critical,

 

00:20:24:10 – 00:20:28:02

thing is this part of it all that 

sometimes we don’t like

 

00:20:28:02 – 00:20:29:20

is like how do we call them out?

 

00:20:30:14 – 00:20:33:12

How do we bring them to the table and say

 

00:20:33:12 – 00:20:35:20

this is what I’m seeing.

 

00:20:35:20 – 00:20:36:16

What’s going on?

 

00:20:36:16 – 00:20:40:23

I think that’s what it what I was saying

that the listening part of the dialog.

 

00:20:41:11 – 00:20:42:18

You know.

 

00:20:42:18 – 00:20:46:20

But in the educational system right now,

going back to your question

 

00:20:46:20 – 00:20:47:13

Yeah.

 

00:20:47:13 – 00:20:51:15

If you’re good memorizing, you pass,

if you’re not good memorizing 

 

00:20:51:15 – 00:20:53:11

or something happened, then you have an issue.

 

00:20:53:11 – 00:20:58:20

But. Yes. How many people know how to write an essay

and that’s is actually really interesting.

 

00:20:59:00 – 00:21:03:20

Yes. How many people can actually 

come and write a nice essay, or

 

00:21:04:03 – 00:21:07:02

Without ChatGPT. Without ChatGPT then.

 

00:21:07:18 – 00:21:10:18

So I think those are the things that,

 

00:21:11:07 – 00:21:13:14

you know,

I see beautiful things in the educational system,

 

00:21:13:14 – 00:21:16:22

the other day was in a class

that they were teaching how to cook.

 

00:21:17:05 – 00:21:22:08

That is something that we never probably

will imagine in our time, but I think it’s great.

 

00:21:22:08 – 00:21:24:05

But in other parts as well it’s like

 

00:21:26:01 – 00:21:26:22

What’s going on?

 

00:21:26:22 – 00:21:31:04

I think there is a,

there is a lot of things that has to be

 

00:21:33:02 – 00:21:36:05

we need to redefine

how do we want to teach, what is the

 

00:21:36:05 – 00:21:38:04

what is the outcomes that we want?

 

00:21:38:04 – 00:21:40:06

I am not in that sense an expert,

 

00:21:40:06 – 00:21:45:07

I can tell you all this is what I would do,

because it has to be a process thinking

 

00:21:45:18 – 00:21:48:07

where we go into the

into the field and say,

 

00:21:48:07 – 00:21:51:07

okay, what do we want from

 our young people?

 

00:21:51:09 – 00:21:53:19

Because if you really think about education,

 

00:21:53:19 – 00:21:56:03

you came out of the, the, kings, you know.

 

00:21:56:03 – 00:21:58:23

The kings wanted to educate their, their,

 

00:21:59:07 – 00:22:00:20

their, their children.

 

00:22:00:20 – 00:22:03:14

That was part of the education 

system that they started.

 

00:22:03:17 – 00:22:06:06

Right. Now for us, education is interesting,

 

00:22:07:00 – 00:22:09:10

More people live longer.

 

00:22:09:10 – 00:22:11:01

So we don’t have as many jobs

as you used to have.

 

00:22:11:01 – 00:22:15:00

So education is part of the system where

you can be trained before you go to work.

 

00:22:16:16 – 00:22:19:12

Where we are not working we need to

we can do

 

00:22:19:12 – 00:22:23:11

Well, I do think that critical thinking

is something that is lacking

 

00:22:23:11 – 00:22:28:12

in most educational programs

because the focus is so much on testing.

 

00:22:29:05 – 00:22:32:05

And like you said,

if you can memorize, if you can test well,

 

00:22:32:10 – 00:22:33:17

then you perform well.

 

00:22:33:17 – 00:22:37:07

But what is that going to do for you

if you just have a bunch of facts

 

00:22:37:07 – 00:22:40:07

sitting in your head

and you don’t even know how to use them?

 

00:22:40:15 – 00:22:46:09

So that would be my hope, is that, you

know, what do we do with this information?

 

00:22:46:09 – 00:22:48:00

What do we do with what we’re memorizing?

 

00:22:48:00 – 00:22:49:10

How do we learn from it?

 

00:22:49:10 – 00:22:51:08

Especially how do we learn from history?

 

00:22:51:08 – 00:22:54:08

Because I don’t think we’re necessarily

learning that much,

 

00:22:54:13 – 00:22:58:04

but it sounds like so much reform

needs to be made.

 

00:22:58:11 – 00:23:01:11

But at least at the very smallest amount,

 

00:23:01:22 – 00:23:05:05

just helping children learn

how to be better critical

 

00:23:05:05 – 00:23:08:05

thinkers will help them be more adaptable,

 

00:23:08:14 – 00:23:13:06

especially if they do stumble

and fall and fail

 

00:23:13:13 – 00:23:16:10

and need to figure out

how to learn from that.

 

00:23:16:10 – 00:23:17:22

One of the things that

 

00:23:17:22 – 00:23:19:21

right now when you were speaking, brings to my mind is that

 

00:23:19:21 – 00:23:21:16

the polarization that we have.

 

00:23:22:03 – 00:23:25:18

We cannot sit in the same table

and talk about politics, for example.

 

00:23:25:18 – 00:23:28:09

Yes. Because many people are not willing. Yes.

 

00:23:28:22 – 00:23:32:13

And the problem with that is as soon as you are not capable

to disagree with something else,

 

00:23:33:03 – 00:23:34:14

then we have an issue. Yeah.

 

00:23:34:14 – 00:23:36:16

Because the critical thinking and everything goes

 

00:23:36:16 – 00:23:39:10

to backup what your beliefs are.

 

00:23:39:15 – 00:23:42:20

I was reading this book

the other day, this audio book was saying that

 

00:23:43:21 – 00:23:47:05

the same way the body reacts or used to react

 

00:23:47:05 – 00:23:51:20

when a bear would chase you down,

 is the same way your body reacts

 

00:23:51:20 – 00:23:55:13

when someone is disagreeing or 

challenging your beliefs.

 

00:23:55:13 – 00:23:58:09

Wow. Think about it. Yes.

 

00:23:58:09 – 00:24:02:00

Right now for example,

even in our culture, it’s unbelievable.

 

00:24:03:05 – 00:24:07:09

As soon a someone is pro or against, 

there is no conversation. Yes.

 

00:24:07:14 – 00:24:11:15

There is no dialogue to see what it is, 

but is actually I’m trying to convince you

 

00:24:11:15 – 00:24:13:08

what I believe is right.

 

00:24:13:22 – 00:24:16:22

I think part of the problem is in our culture,

we are so sensitive about things

 

00:24:17:19 – 00:24:20:07

Microaggressions. Yes.

 

00:24:20:07 – 00:24:22:20

If someone said something and you 

take it as a microaggression,

 

00:24:22:20 – 00:24:24:14

like oh my goodness, so we

 

00:24:25:07 – 00:24:29:08

in my time this concept

of microaggressions or things

 

00:24:29:11 – 00:24:31:19

didn’t exist, you need to 

survive where you are.

 

00:24:31:19 – 00:24:33:16

You need to be who you are. Yes.

 

00:24:34:15 – 00:24:37:15

But I also think that civilized dialog

 

00:24:37:20 – 00:24:41:16

between people who are opposing

each other, you know, politically

 

00:24:42:06 – 00:24:47:09

back in the 80s, yeah, there were plenty

of disagreements and nobody was

 

00:24:47:09 – 00:24:49:06

you know, necessarily

seeing each other side.

 

00:24:49:06 – 00:24:52:17

But the way that they communicated,

I think was different.

 

00:24:52:17 – 00:24:55:07

It was a lot more respectful.

 

00:24:55:07 – 00:25:00:04

And I think when you throw respect out

the window, then nobody’s going to listen.

 

00:25:00:13 – 00:25:03:01

And that I think is a huge problem.

 

00:25:03:01 – 00:25:04:20

Yeah, I agree with you.

 

00:25:04:20 – 00:25:07:18

But one thing, if we go back to the point of

 

00:25:07:18 – 00:25:09:18

how do we communicate.

 

00:25:09:18 – 00:25:13:15

How do we

how are we able to listen to others?

 

00:25:13:21 – 00:25:14:19

Yeah.

 

00:25:14:19 – 00:25:18:16

When someone is speaking, already

someone is thinking about what I’m going to answer.

 

00:25:18:16 – 00:25:19:10

Right.

 

00:25:19:10 – 00:25:21:05

And working with young people,

 

00:25:21:16 – 00:25:24:15

You can’t. I mean, if you really want

to help them out to grow 

 

00:25:24:15 – 00:25:26:14

help them out to see things differently,

 

00:25:26:14 – 00:25:29:20

you have to have a clear understanding of who you are first of all.

 

00:25:29:20 – 00:25:34:00

and second of all is,

allow them to be. Yes.

 

00:25:34:12 – 00:25:39:11

That means that even

if you are not in agreement, how can you,

 

00:25:39:11 – 00:25:42:18

how can you be in the point

that you understand each other?

 

00:25:43:03 – 00:25:46:09

Yes. Well,

we’re going to get much more into this

 

00:25:46:09 – 00:25:50:07

in the second half of this episode,

but we’re out of time for this half.

 

00:25:50:15 – 00:25:53:11

But please tune in

 

00:25:53:11 – 00:25:58:10

for the next half of this incredible

episode with executive director,

 

00:25:58:10 – 00:26:02:21

life coach, and nonprofit leader, 

Doctor Jc Montenegro.

 

00:26:03:04 – 00:26:04:20

Thank you. Jc.

Thank you.

 

00:26:06:03 – 00:26:09:08

Thanks for tuning into 

the ANEW Insight Podcast.

 

00:26:09:08 – 00:26:12:00

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00:26:12:00 – 00:26:16:20

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00:26:16:20 – 00:26:19:16

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00:26:19:16 – 00:26:22:05

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00:26:22:05 – 00:26:27:02

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00:26:27:02 – 00:26:35:01

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00:26:35:01 – 00:26:38:03

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